I know, this is a bit of a different take for me.
I do not believe in staying in a marriage where you are not supported… AND… I also know some girlies do not want to leave their marriage for their own reasons. OR just can’t within the next 6-12 month. I am never here to tell anyone to stay or leave so there is that too.
So exactly how do you stay when it feels you’re soooo alone?
Here are some things to think about:
You're Not Alone: Thriving as a Married Single Mom
Ever feel like you're running on fumes? You're not alone. Many married moms carry the weight of single parenthood, even with a spouse by their side. This feeling, often referred to as being a "married single mom," can lead to overwhelm and strain on your relationship.
But here's the good news: You can thrive in your marriage and as a mom. Here are some actionable steps to get you started:
1. Define Your "Married Single Mom" Experience:
Acknowledge the Feeling: Don't dismiss your emotions. Talk to your partner openly about feeling like a single parent.
Identify the Cause: Is it your spouse's long work hours, unequal division of chores, or lack of emotional support? Specificity helps create solutions.
2. Rebalance the Load:
Schedule a "Family Meeting": Sit down together and map out household tasks and childcare responsibilities.
Embrace Delegation: Don't be afraid to ask for help! Delegate chores and childcare fairly, considering everyone's schedule and strengths.
Utilize Resources: Explore babysitting options, meal prep services, or grocery delivery to lighten the load.
3. Prioritize Communication:
Schedule Regular Check-Ins: Dedicate time, even if it's just 15 minutes daily, to genuinely connect and talk about your day.
Practice Active Listening: Really hear what your partner is saying, and avoid interrupting.
Express Appreciation: Thank your partner for their efforts, big or small.
4. Refuel Your Relationship:
Plan Date Nights (or Mornings!): Reconnect as a couple. Even small gestures like coffee dates or shared hobbies can make a difference.
Maintain Physical Intimacy: Schedule intimacy or simply prioritize physical touch.
Seek Support Together: Consider couples counseling to address deeper issues or learn new communication tools.
5. Remember You:
Self-Care is Not Selfish: Schedule time for activities you enjoy, even if it's just a relaxing bath or reading a book.
Connect with Your Village: Build a support system of friends, family, or online communities.
Don't Be Afraid to Ask for Help: Whether it's childcare, errands, or emotional support, lean on your network.
Bonus Tip: Celebrate Your Wins!
Being a married single mom is tough, but you're strong and capable. Acknowledge your progress, big or small.
Things I can help you with:
Gaining clarity on whether you want to stay or leave your marriage. Click here for my workbook to help you explore and process your life as a married single mom.
If you are contemplating divorce, have filed for divorce or are divorced and want to connect with women who are also in the same space as you, click here (this is for Maryland moms only).
If you’re not quite ready to leave and want to start finding your hobbies, passions, how to challenge your negative thoughts easily and mental health hacks… You need my Secrets To Thriving As A Married Single Mom e-book!
If you want to work with me 1:1- click here for more info!